


Ruined Hopes

by Megumis_gf_asf



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Character Death, Heavy Angst, Last wish, Last words, Lung Cancer, Other, POV Miya Osamu, Song: Wires (The Neighbourhood), Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:14:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27838174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megumis_gf_asf/pseuds/Megumis_gf_asf
Summary: Okay, first of all. This is NOT a ship ff, I don't ship them because simply, ew. This is angst because I saw last night in my sleep my brother's death and I connected the dots. Hope you like it!
Relationships: Miya Atsumu & Miya Osamu
Comments: 2
Kudos: 42





	Ruined Hopes

**Author's Note:**

> okay so a few notes: italics are Osamu's thoughts   
> bold italics: memories from the past

"You know, I know I always said that I hated you, but to be completely honest. I didn't. I never hated you. I should've told you earlier, I know. Better late than never, I guess. I love you. You had always been there since the moment I came out of mom's womb. Always there when we walked, when we talked, when we joined the team, when I got rejected by my first girlfriend. Whether I want to admit it or not, you've always been there for me. So plea-"

"Osamu, we're leaving sweetheart. Whatever happens call us immediately okay?" mom's voice from the door made me look up.

"Okay, see ya" I waved and they smiled softly at me before the door closed.

I sighed and looked at 'Tsumu. Or whatever there was left of him. He had become progressively worse. Not even the chemo helped him anymore.

"'Sa-mu" his croaked voice made me look up and walk to his bed.

"You're awake" I smiled at him and he looked around.

"Where's mom and dad?" he asked as he looked back at me.

"They just left, want me to call them?" I went to grab my phone but Tsumu's hand stopped me.

"No, it's fine, I need a little time alone" he said, his voice just above a whisper as he let go of my wrist.

"Okay, I'll be here, tell me whatever you need" I said softly and sat on his bed.

"I heard you" he said after a period of silence. 

_What?!_

"I love you too you know. You may get on my nerves at times but I would still die for you" tears started prickling in the corners of my eyes.

"Don't talk about death. Please don't. You're gonna be fine" although I said it all to him, I was just trying to reassure myself.

"Osamu. We're 19. I think you're old enough to live without me. I'm not saying that I'll die, but it's oky if I die. You'll still have people to support you. Sunarin, Kita-san, Aran-kun. You won't be alone. Besides, even if I die, I'll never leave you okay? I'll be always watching over you." Atsumu said softly and I couldn't take it anymore.

I broke down, crying on my brother's hospital bed. It hurt. It felt as if he was preparing me for what I feared the most.

"Stop. Don't prepare me for what isn't coming. You'll live and we'll be together like we always were." my shoulders shook as I looked at him.

He didn't say anything but I felt his hand on my shoulder and a soft hiss. I snapped my head around and saw the wires on his arm stretching. I panicked and quickly set his hand back down.

"Don't" I stammered and instead grabbed his hand.

"I don't like seeing you cry 'Samu and you know it." he said as he closed his eyes.

"I'm going to sleep. See you later" he mumbled before he started snoring softly. I sighed and drew circles on the top of his hand. 

_He'll live. Trust your brother!_

  


~~~ a few days later ~~~

  


"MOM!" I yelled as I sprinted down the hallway towards my brother's room where my parents were pacing in front of.

"Your brother. He lost consciousness while he was making his chemo. The doctors are trying to stabilize him." dad said with the calmest voice he could master.

My eyes widened. 

_No. He couldn't die. You promised me 'Tsumu._

I looked through the small window on the door. I couldn't see him except for his right arm hanging from the bed. Doctors were surrounding him, the defibrillator next to him and a barely beating heart from the heart monitor.

And at that moment Osamu realized. 

_I'm losing my brother._

Just a simple thought but it was enough to bring Osamu to his knees. He walked back and fell on the seat. 

_My brother is dying. And I can't help him. Just, how? He has always been there for me and how do I repay him?_

He crumbled, his heart feeling heavy.

_**I don't like seeing you cry 'Samu and you know it.** _

_But how do I do that Tsumu? You're leaving me alone._

**_Besides, even if I die, I'll never leave you okay? I'll be always watching over you._ **

_You selfish bastard. Even now you just do whatever you feel like doing. I'll miss you. I'll miss you so much! You've always been there for the past 19 years of our lives. How can I forgive you after this?!_

**_I would still die for you._ **   


_I never asked you to die for me though. I love you Atsumu._

**_I love you too you know._ **

I snapped out of my thoughts when the door opened.

"What happened to my brother?!" I immediately jumped up and looked at the doctor. 

"We tried everything we could but the cancer cells completely suffocated the heart. I'm sorry." 

_No. No. No. No. NO!_

"Osamu. Go see him too. We'll see you home" dad's voice reached my ears. I nodded softly and walked in. 

I locked the door behind me and looked at Atsumu. And that was the first time I cried that day.

I didn't realize when I reached the bed. I didn't realize when I hugged his body and started crying on his shoulder.

"WHY?! WHY DID _YOU_ HAVE TO DIE?! WHY WASN'T _I_ THE TWIN WITH THE BAD LUCK?! IT'S NOT FAIR! _YOU_ DESERVED TO LIVE!" 

I kept screaming and I crying until my throat was sore and no more tears came out. 

And that was when I saw the piece of paper in his hand. 

"Dan 'Tsumu, you really like being dramatic even after your death huh?" he chuckled softly as he unfoded the paper in his hand.

_"Hey, 'Samu, do you remember when I was first diagnosed with cancer? I can still remember what you had said. "I am claiming your sweatshirts". Well, there you have it. You can have them all. But seriously now, this is my last goodbye to you. I know that you cried when you heard from the doctor that I died. Please don't cry. I don't like seeing you cry when I'm not there. Please, this is my last wish to you. Don't forget our life together. I will always be part of your life whether you like it or not. I know others will eventually forget me. And I'm honestly okay with it. But I will seriously hate you so hard if you forget me. Oh I know! I'll haunt your onigiri shop! So don't you dare forget me got it?! Well, then, I don't think I have anything else to say, see you I hope in many years from now. Live a long life, confess to Sunarin, he likes you too (don't ask how I found out and don't tell him that I gave away his secret, he'll kill me, not literaly but yeah) and I hope you remember me once in a while. See ya later, 'Samu. I love ya. Your older twin, Atsumu._   


"Damn you 'Tsumu, I love ya too. See ya" I said softly and looked at him.

_I won't disappoint you, Tsumu._

**Author's Note:**

> Okay I'm not joking I actually cried while writing this, it triggered me, especially since I've lost my brother too. Well, hope you liked it, I tried my best. As always, kudos, comments and shares are highly appreciated. See ya guys!


End file.
